I heard a whisper just as I prepared to depart the talent shoot upstairs in Suite54, that none other than Noirin Kelly of big brother fame was downstairs in Tonic. My curious legs began to move and soon I'd located the sultry stunner celebrating an engagement with friends, there was only one feasible course of action.

Fortunately for me, Noirin is no snob and was quite happy to chat in a way you could almost call bubbly except we're not talking about some ditsy airhead, she's Ferrero Rocher rather than your snack-sized Aero. I still can't recall if I wished the happy couple seated there well on their partnership, that's male tunnel vision for you and a beauty like Noirin makes the affliction far more debilitating. Anyway, straight after initial salutations I requested a photo. (To spring it later would call the integrity of intervening pleasantries into question since that has the effect of lightweight emotional blackmail, intended or not.) Astute readers will have correctly deduced the outcome.

The internet has since underscored that a camera-shy rebuff was not most likely but there's more to that if you read on, anyway I'd seen her on Big Brother once but being uninformed as we met I wondered if she might have been overwhelmed by all the post-traumatic publicity and just vanted to be alone. Noirin has taken it all in her stride though, she's fresh and ready for any challenge.

The only time I ever watched big brother for longer than it takes to move my thumb was when Noirin appeared mid-surf by chance, hello! She was in a lively debate with a chap over a beer he'd taken or something, and while it was clear that he'd not been fully honest he wasn't going to concede to having lied, apparently his family honour was staked on this one event. It seemed that dragging him over the coals for so long would outweigh his original transgression and she'd do well to wrap it up leaving it to viewers to decide his fate. A few times she moved to do so but his attempt to save face came over as evasive double-talk, so frustrating that I found myself thinking up points I hoped she'd put. A Machiavellian approach would have served her better in this edited public popularity contest, and Noirin knew it, but I can fully identify with her difficulty in leaving an exchange like that at anything but the truth.

Back to Tonic, among Noirin's friends were a few chaps from Cork. I happen to like Corkonians having worked with a few over the years. Some of the older cohort there have been spurred to admirable achievement by their second city complex, and it's paying dividends. The younger generation don't see Dublin that way it's not an issue, they'll make their way in life regardless of where they came from or where in the world they go.

These chaps were a perfect example, friendly to a fault even as they offered me a drink and invited me to join them. Though Noirin was still smiling when I glanced to gauge her reaction, I declined saying I'd had enough and was about to go, the whole truth being I still assumed it would be an imposition both for Noirin and/or the engaged couple. Maybe that was a mistake, but as it happened it wasn't the end of our interaction.

With the notion of a drink now seeded in my mind I went to the bar for a 7-up knowing more Guinness would only make me thirstier, and retreated to the smoking area for a sobering dose of fresh air, besides, it goes against the grain to leave a place when you've been having a good time. So I'm chatting away to some randomers and Noirin arrives out with three of the Cork lads, they could've walked on by with a hi but they joined us.

The randomers immediately focussed on Noirin asking her what it was like being on that show etc. While she handled them well it was clear that they were in flying form to such an extent that they were out of kilter with those of us not in extreme hyper states. Once I saw the diminished extent of her smile that was my cue to get her the couple of steps back to her Cork lads, she knew exactly why I did so and obviously appreciated it because when I moved to get between her and the increasingly hypers she tipped my arm and softly said "no, you stay here". I received a peck on the cheek too, made my heart soar like an eagle.

It was during this time that my spidey senses were tingling. I can't know for a fact if Noirin is involved with one of the Cork chaps, there was no hand-holding or snogging, but I couldn't determine for certain if these chaps were there for any reason other than to be with her. Though their attentiveness is inconclusive, on balance my impression is that there's a strong possibility our Noirin is no longer single.

If I were ten years younger jealousy might be justified, but the guys seem really decent so if she is dating one of them then good call, being cursed with the caring gene if Noirin's happy then I can't complain. You see, I remember watching Mutiny on the Bounty as a chiseller and being mesmerised by the Polynesian women, the dark hair and eyes, and exotic skin tones. Smitten for life and there's no off switch. Sadly the competition is fierce and I'm no spring cocklet.

More sadly, it's a damn shame that the very thing I find so attractive in such women has been used against them growing up in Ireland. I've crossed paths with a few and seen the same story, it can be generalised to encompass genders and other differences like having non-Irish parents, being very poor, overweight, red-haired etc. so a lot of readers will identify with the experience. Ireland is the only home Noirin has ever known and she's as paddy as can be, not that similarity should make a difference, but certain people with a twisted attitude have always been determined to make her feel like she doesn't belong.

It doesn't take a genius to imagine. As a child she may have run home crying, asking what the cruel words from hateful faces meant, been comforted and taught 'sticks and stones...'. So a few times the correct solution worked, pain in, tears out. She'll have toughened up though and stopped telling her mum and dad every time because she didn't want to disappoint them that their advice wasn't a cure-all or to constantly bring problems into the family home. While schoolyard taunts may have seemed to roll like water off a ducks back, the fact that some other kids were being mean still had an impact, chipping away at fledgling inner confidence. This early injustice contributed to why she is now a straight talker with a heightened sense of right and wrong, so for example wouldn't easily let that beer argument go.

So she probably had a tough road to travel, but her looks and personality would have meant having friends she could count on for support. The enchanted males among them intensified the jealousy of bad-minded females, but those guys would also have been most proactive in providing a soft place to fall, acting like a drug. Now as an adult her coping skills are more than a match for those who might attempt to make her feel bad, she knows her value so they just fail and lose respect. By times someone close may use the n word hoping to desensitise since she knows they're on her side, but not appreciating that memories can't be rewritten, and this type in particular shouldn't be, they're what made us who we are.

Lots of people will identify with the above scenario under the general umbrella of differencism. As Phil Lynott answered about his experience growing up "in Finglas if you've got big ears you've got big ears". It would be great if it were all in the past but sadly prejudice lives on, some act as though anything but bullying is taking political correctness too far, or seek to incite hatred under the banner of free speech. These things are deleterious to the common good, we need to move on to something resembling civilisation not just so no-one has to hear toxic effluent, but the purveyors should learn not to be so stupid as to put permanent debits on their ethics accounts.

People who aren't big on thinking or giving a damn about others could easily categorise Noirin as a mere attention-seeker. Besides the fact that there are more strings to her bow, if you consider memories of childhood pain it makes sense that going on big brother while definitely a wise career move probably also appeared as an opportunity to finally lay old demons to rest, the public support will have brought welcome validation, but in mediaville not all coverage is positive. Posing topless for a magazine afterwards was economically sound but again that can be seen as falling back on what she learned in her youth, that guys can be relied upon for support. This is all speculation though, ultimately only Noirin knows to what extent various inner forces play a role in her decisions.

Looking forward my only concern would be that an over-reliance on male support may not deliver the full contentment Noirin deserves because we men tend not to be sufficiently constant in that capacity, we can never truly understand the heart and mind of a woman and we'll never get what it's like to give birth. Except that one guy Ted. The happiest women tend to have plenty of female backup in a mutual support group. It's true that some use this to betray their man's privacy or do character assassination to even the score (a sign that this comfort zone may be making it easier for them to stay in a bad relationship), but usually it's just so they don't begin to feel alone in their man's world. To wrap up before I begin to ramble, it was a real pleasure to meet Noirin, I look forward to seeing what she does next (maybe a chat show) and I wish her the best in the future, single or knot.